Why So Jealous, Miley?

Why do holier-than-thou tween morons feel the need to open their yappers about anyone? Especially when this particular anyone is one of the hottest new actors in the scene. I don't even have to go into detail about Robert Pattinson because he is incredible. And not just for the reasons Miley Cyrus thinks:

"I'm not a huge Rob Pattinson fan. Girls aren't really in love with Rob; they're in love with [his Twilight character] Edward."

First and foremost- I love Rob. And Edward. The fact that he is Rob and he plays Edward is simply coincidental. Secondly- you're a no-talent slut with a whorish mouth. Don't get mad because RPattz and the Twilight Saga has taken attention away from your terrible show, your whacktastic movies, and your even shittier albums. Oh, or are you losing fans because their parents think you're a terrible role model and don't want their children turning into someone like you? I presume it's the latter.

CC [Ya Later] Sabbatical

It's baseball season! Does that signify a pop culture shop sabbatical no more? My sources point to yes...

I just had to pay homage to America's past-time with awesome nineties photos of Donnie Baseball and Chris Sabo

...But I guess we will have to see, as the Yankees and Reds take the field today, both teams with talented rotations and lineups; one with many more expectations and even more to lose if their season isn't a successful one. The anticipation has built to an all-time high throughout the Yankees' extremely eventful and productive off-season. With CC Sabathia and AJ Burnett beefing up [let's hope this time that doesn't mean literally] the Bombers' already-stellar rotation [joining Wang, Pettite and Chamberlain], this could finally be the year they've been looking for since their last title in 2000. And I don't even need to get started on the line-up [with or without ARod, it's unreal]. This season is going to be one for the books. I guess when you're talking about the Yanks, what year isn't?

The hype around the Reds this year should be great for the city, even though year in and year out Cincy crawls with die-hards despite god-awful records. Their young, carefree players won't be playing under much pressure, and should provide for great entertainment at Great American Ballpark. It would be nice if they get to make a postseason appearance. I mean, it's been about 15 years anyway.

Looking forward to an amazing MLB season.

linseyly way of doing things

i love adverbs. what could be better than a modifier of a verb; where all the action happens around here.

definitely. absolutely. specifically. especially. i even love making them up (standardly).

instead of simply (see?) throwing a boring "yes" as an answer to a question, embellish your dialog with an adverb

I'm on sabbatical... Or so I wish

I've clearly taken a hiatus.

I suppose my being discouraged from the [unsuccessful] search for a full-time job directly reflects my feeling unmotivated in everyday life, thus affecting my once-persistent need to blog. That was a very complex sentence, which I suppose also reflects the jumble into which my brain has spiraled.

It's been over a year (and over, I'm sure, hundreds of applications/sent résumés; I haven't kept track) since I graduated college. Still, no bites for a full-time job. That is sure to make a huge blow to my ego and confidence as a "designer." I've started applying for glorified secretarial, clerical and even telephone operator positions (not that those are necessarily bad, but I didn't go to a four-year university for graphic design to not pursue relevant endeavors!), all to no avail. (And yes, I look around the entire country).

I've considered grad school (for either creative writing or social work; hey, I need options here), but my current, massive amount of debt from undergrad hinders that decision greatly, and (gasp) learning web design. Somewhere along the lines and the growth of the industry (perhaps just the boom of the world wide web?), employers have become deluded into thinking that graphic designers need to know web and web designers need to be trained and qualified in graphic design. They are two different professions and each should not be expected to know and excel in the other. But hell, it looks as though at this point, I need to learn it if I ever want to get a job.

New Artist!

Marina & the Diamonds (she is Marina and we are the diamonds) is amazing. No, really. Amazing. Her single, "Obsessions" won't be released until February (pre-order at www.neongoldrecords.com), but I've attached two videos since they are hard to find online: one of the aforementioned and another one of her songs, "Mowgli's Road."

Obsessions

Mowgli's Road

Oh. My. God.

Hopefully I don't need to buy my first new car for a few years, but if this car is out when the time comes, OMG. I am in love:2009 Chevy El Camino mock-up <3

Amazing

Video courtesy of PerezHilton.com and YouTube

Holding on tight

The economy is in the crapper and we all know that.

Except now it's hitting a little bit too-close-for-comfort to home.

It's not every year that one graduates college and enters the job market during a recession. Oh, the joys of being tens-upon-tens-of-thousands-of-dollars in debt amidst the near impossibility of finding a full-time job. Then the mind starts to dabble: is there credibility in a bachelor's degree any more? Was there really even a point? That very well may be my thoughts after settling into apathy and my potentially-developing depression: direct side effects of a recent graduate thrown into the oblivion known as our current economy.

I was reading a couple of articles on designobserver.com which spearhead this subject and the worries (I know I have) in regard to working in the design industry. This, I'm sure, can apply to most industries, so those of you who are suffering (or will suffer soon enough) from this same stress, take heed:

Murray Moss, the guest write on Design Observer, wrote "Design Hates a Depression" in response to "Design Loves a Depression" and here are a few excerpts from his entry:

I can assure you that design, along with painting, sculpture, photography, music, dance, fashion, the culinary arts, architecture, and theatre, loves a depression no more than it loves a war, a flood, or a plague.

[Design] tends to suffer, like any of the other humanistic disciplines. New ideas do not get championed or realized. Leadership turns to market-driven accommodation.

It does tend to suffer. And so do I. Thus, I've started this spiral into apathy because I am feeling more and more discouraged. Thankfully, in all of Michael Beirut's (graphic designer, design critic, educator, former VP of Vignelli Associates, current partner at Pentagram, graduate of the University of Cincinnati's DAAP program, and all-around bad mamma jamma) 28 years in the industry, he's gained knowledge and valuable experience and decided to grace us with some light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel-encouragement:

Be frugal
Be careful
Be creative
Be sociable
and most importantly BE PATIENT.

My friend the ex-hedge fund guy (he did get out in time) told me recently, "In the middle of every boom, people say, 'This one is different, it's never going to come down.' But it always does." This was true with dot-coms, and it was true with real estate. "In recessions, they fear the same thing: this one is different. But it will eventually turn around after all the crap gets worked out." And it will, eventually. Just hold on tight.

You may have noticed something interesting: all of these tips for what to do in a recession will work just as well in good times. Or even better. So the final lesson is to use this downturn as a learning experience. If you've got this discipline to survive, or even thrive, in the next year or so, you'll be mastering skills that will serve you well forever. Good luck.

I'll surely need luck indeed. And I'm holding on tight.

Either/Or with Perez Hilton

Video courtesy of PerezHilton.com

Here are my answers:
Boxers, Briefs or Commando? Briefs
Tattoos or Piercings? Tattoos
Britney Spears or Paris Hilton? Britney Spears
Smooth or Crunchy? Crunchy
Mousse, Gel or Hairspray? Curls Rock Amplifying Cream or bust!
Are you pushy or a pushover? A little bit of both
Kiss or no kiss on a first date? Kiss
Tea or coffee? Coffee
Katy Perry or Lily Allen? Katy Perry
Robert Pattinson or Taylor Lautner? ROBERT PATTINSON (!!!!!)
Rod Blagojevich or Eliot Spitzer? Eliot Spitzer
Hard or Soft? Soft
Christina Aguilera or Lady Gaga? Christina Aguilera
Miley Cyrus or Vanessa Hudgens? Neither
David Beckham or Cristiano Ronaldo? DAVID BECKHAM (!)
People or Us Weekly? Us Weekly
Mariah Carey or Beyonce? Mariah Carey
A night out with the girls or a night in with a guy? Night out with the girls
Ryan Seacrest or Simon Cowell? Ryan Seacrest

How would you answer?

"Most improbable cross-racial/cross-gender lookalike involving a Hollywood actress and an NFL figure"

Bill Simmons, the Sports Guy who regularly contributes to ESPN's Page 2, is a f--cking genius. I'm currently perusing his latest submission regarding the NFL Playoffs (and all of its absurdities; while giving out 'awards' for the many highlights in the playoffs thus far), and it really brings the lolz. It's pretty embarrassing to be sitting at work, reading and meandering my way around the 'net when I stumble upon such comedic gold as this (because then I start laughing like a crazed asylum escapee):

The Glenn Close/Harry Carson Award for "Most improbable cross-racial/cross-gender lookalike involving a Hollywood actress and an NFL figure"

I watched the Colts-Bolts game just a few hours after seeing "Marley and Me" and can confirm the following because I stared at her for two hours on a 60-foot screen: Jennifer Aniston looks like Tony Dungy. I am now convinced this is why Brad Pitt dumped her. He was probably watching a Colts game in HD and got freaked out.

The Originals: Harry Carson/Glenn Close

Jennifer Aniston/Tony Dungy

...That is the most random assessment I've ever heard when it comes to Jennifer Aniston and Tony Dungy, but whatever entertains, works for me. Read the rest of Bill Simmons' Round 2 picks here- it's pure comedy.

What do you think of the comparison(s)?

To the fans of the University of Florida...

(and to all of us who enjoyed when this man turned "The" Ohio State University into Gator bait by manhandling them in the 2006 BCS game 41-14): You can thank my alma mater, Bowling Green State University, because it is there where Urban Meyer got his head coaching start in NCAA football.

Top 10 Movie Posters of 2008

Inspired by Yahoo!'s list of the Best and Worst Movie Posters of 2008, I set out to create a list of my own, using many of the same that they chose for their's, but a few after looking at IMP Awards 2008 Movie Poster Gallery. Because I can and because it's what I do, I've even turned this into a Top 10. Go fig.

As a graphic designer (and one-time-movie-poster-designer), it is perhaps my duty to critique movie posters and their effectiveness. I really enjoy seeing beautifully designed one-sheets, however the terrible ones are pretty hilarious in their own right and deserve some kind of recognition as well. Hell, I guess that's what the entertainment industry is there for: to entertain. Thanks to Yahoo!'s list of the Best and Worst Movie Posters of 2008, I've chosen some that are so incredible that they leave me wanting to stare and analyze for longer than necessary. And some that are so awesomely bad that I cannot resist mentioning.

Onward to the list!

The Air I Breathe

Burn After Reading


The Cool School


The Dark Knight


The Family That Preys


Funny Games


Man on Wire

The Spirit

Taxi to the Dark Side

Valkyrie

Top 10 Books From My Youth

What were your favorite books as a kid?
I read a lot of incredible books as a child, whether they were picture books (only my two favorite ever have graced the list) or chapter books. I decided that I would continue the "Top 10" trend and dig back to my elementary school days to try to remember at least some of the books I loved. I'm sure there are many, many more, but I'm still glad I remember most of them [my memory hasn't quite started to fade yet, thank Google]. Anywho, onward to the list [in alphabetical order, of course]!

Amelia Bedelia Series
Peggy Parrish

Amelia Bedelia is a housekeeper to a wealthy couple, who takes every assignment she has very literally. She makes sponge cake by mixing the cake batter with real sponge. When told to "run home" while playing baseball, she literally runs back to her employer's house. Of the many books that have been published, there are four that I remember as being favorites: Thank You, Amelia Bedelia; Come Back, Amelia Bedelia; Play Ball, Amelia Bedelia; Amelia Bedelia's Family Album.

The Baby-Sitters Little Sister
Ann M. Martin

When The Baby-Sitters Club was at its prime in publishing, I was still a little too young to really enjoy the content. That's where The Baby-Sitters Little Sister came into play, focusing on Karen, the 7-year-old stepsister of Kristy, the Baby-Sitters Club president. There were well over one hundred BSCLS books published (though not that many when I first started reading them), and of the ones I read, my favorites were Karen's Witch, Karen's Worst Day, and Karen's Little Sister.

The Boxcar Children
Gertrude Chandler Warner

This book is the beginning of the series, telling the story about four siblings (Henry, Jessie, Violet and Benny) whose parents both pass away. Believing their grandfather and legal guardian to be cruel, the four set off to find solace and independence in an abandoned boxcar.

The Boy With the Helium Head
Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

Jonathan goes to the doctor to receive a flu shot and instead receives a shot full of helium, allowing him to float above everything, including Duke, the school bully.

Goosebumps Series
R.L. Stine

In the Haunted Mask, Carly Beth buys a mask at a Halloween store, which becomes her real face, much the same as Jim Carrey in The Mask. This book is a classic from my youth, and from the Classic Goosebumps collection that we all knew and loved as kids. One Day at Horrorland is also a very good one.

Miss Nelson is Missing!
Harry Allard

When "the worst-behaved class in the whole school" doesn't know where their teacher, Miss Nelson, has disappeared to, she immediately reappears, albeit disguised as Miss Viola Swamp. Miss Swamp forces them to behave while Detective McSmogg cannot figure out the mystery, only to have Miss Nelson return (sans wig, ugly clothes and fake nose) to a better behaved class.

The Mouse and the Motorcycle
Beverly Cleary

Ralph S. Mouse resides in a hotel room, and as all of its patrons come and go, one memorable family with a young son (Keith) occupies the room. Using the boy's toy motorcycle, he finally gets out of the hotel room.

Muggie Maggie
Beverly Cleary

I love cursive handwriting, and, in turn, have always loved the book titled Muggle Maggie by Beverly Cleary about a girl who vows never to read and write those wiggly, squiggly, roller-coaster letters. Then her teacher, Mrs. Leeper, says Maggie's cursive is so untidy her name looks like "Muggie," and Maggie decides she will never, never read or write cursive. Nobody can make her. But when Mrs. Leeper appoints Maggie class mail messenger, the notes Maggie must carry are in cursive.

Sideways Stories From Wayside School/Wayside School is Falling Down
Louis Sachar

These are two books out of a series of five (the other three I've never read and can only assume they were published after it was socially acceptable to read at this level), and a staple from elementary school. These were the books that both boys and girls alike could relate with, and it was rare for boys and girls to find common ground at an age where cooties reigned supreme.

Where's My Blankie?
Anna H. Dickson

A character after my own heart, Malcolm Monster is very attached to his security blanket (an old quilt made by Grandma Monster) that he takes everywhere. Malcolm ends up leaving his blankie at his grandparents' house and, after many distractions over a lengthy course of time, grows independent from his linen friend; a feat I have yet to accomplish.

In anticipation...

"Gossip Girl" will grace our TVs once again tonight at 8pm on the CW. What am I going to do when I have to wait months instead of a mere weeks for a new episode?

Cowher: Bengals in playoffs in '09

Bill Cowher is convinced (myself- not so much) that the Cincinnati Bengals will make an appearance in the playoffs next year for three simple reasons...
1. Our defense finished 12th in the league
2. Carson Palmer will be returning
3. Cedric Benson can establish himself as the running back

In my opinion, our defense will be fine, and our stats for the season show just that. When we have a healthy O-line, we can start talking about Carson making a decent return. And as soon as we have some adjustments made in our administration (i.e. obtaining a GM and somehow ridding ourselves of Mike Brown), we can surpass talks about simply going to the playoffs; let's talk Super Bowl. No, I'm only kidding (a fan can wish, eh?), but the joke about Cedric Benson establishing himself as the running back trumps them all. He had two good games against two very terrible defenses. He still has too much to prove.

Bill Cowher is the man though, and let's hope that he's right, but needless to say, I'm not holding my breath.

To the holier-than-thou-'indie'-loving-film-fanatic:

(Disclaimer: Before I get reamed for what I'm about to say, I'm not saying any films that I mention in this post are bad movies –I actually quite like many of them– and that everyone who has these as favorites apply to this rant, but there are a lot of people who hate on mainstream Hollywood and say these are their favorite movies with the sole intention to be trendy and sophisticated and in-the-know about all things great film).

I am very tired of the holier-than-thou-'indie'-loving-film-fanatic. And this includes those people who claim they have the most cred opinions because their favorite 'films' are Garden State and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

I was on a message board about the movie Marley & Me (which I saw yesterday and very much enjoyed) and some people really just need to get rid of their superiority complexes and stop being so snobbish about how "Hollywood is ruining cinema." Get real. In all honesty, I try to watch movies of all kinds (mainstream and indie flicks alike) and it's actually extremely rare that I do not enjoy any movie, regardless of the content (okay, I'll say that I would never watch Meet the Spartans or The Hottie & the Nottie, and although they're not supposed to be deep and meaningful, they very well could be entertaining; just not my thing and I know that before hating on them and talking shit about people who actually do find entertainment in them).

Certain genres may not be your thing and everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, but for the aforementioned holier-than-thou-'indie'-loving-film-fanatic, please, spare us your rants about how Hollywood is "about [making] stupid movies like this one.. or Hollywood comedies in general. They're worth nothing, they're all the same, all just to make money, the people who watch this poor scripted flicks often just wanna see their favorite celebrities or are afraid of looking for something deep." Go enjoy [insert any Christopher Guest, Wes Anderson or Quentin Tarantino film here] and stop forcing your 100% incredibly close-minded opinions on everyone else.

Hollywood is for entertainment. Movies are made to entertain and to allow for an escape. They're fake (albeit based on fact once in a while) and don't have to be realistic. Can we finally just stop all the snobbery? It's old.

A chip off the ol' block

As a spectator, it gets tiring to watching NCAA and NBA basketball players not being able to execute the fundamentals of the game (i.e. free throws and layups, among others). Pat Knight, Bobby's son and heir to the Knight coaching legacy, felt similarly when his Texas Tech players were struggling with making layups.

LUBBOCK, Texas -- Texas Tech Red Raiders coach Pat Knight grew tired of watching his team miss shots that even a child could make. So he found one to illustrate his frustration.

While the Red Raiders (10-4) were busy botching about 15 layups against Stephen F. Austin on Thursday, Knight scoured the stands and invited a youngster to join the team huddle.

Knight asked the boy whether he could make layups. The boy said he could. "I was just tired of having 18- or 21-year-olds miss layups that a 12-year-old could hit, so I brought a 12-year-old in to let them know that he could hit layups," Knight said. "He's 12 and he can hit layups, so why can't you when you're 18 to 21?" The psychological maneuver evidentally worked. A layup by Mike Singletary with 8:44 remaining in the game put Texas Tech up 52-36, and Stephen F. Austin (7-4) couldn't cobble together a comeback. The Red Raiders beat the Lumberjacks, 69-55.

Information from The Associated Press was used in this report.

It's a good thing we (as spectators) get to see Bob's unconventional, effective (however not-so-violent) coaching methods live on through Pat.

First post of 2009 (!)