0-16 is sounding scary real.

Random FYI–
I'm wearing a Bengals shirt for Halloween because the colors are quite appropriate. Oh, and because I don't think I own anything scarier than Bengals attire.

I hope everyone has a safe and awesome Halloween. I've got a few plans this weekend. Maybe I'll even post some pictures post-Halloween of my Ugly Betty costume!

MASH has my life planned out quite nicely

Ah, the good ol' days of my youth. I was getting ready this morning and randomly thought of subject matter for this here blog post: MASH. You know, mansion/apartment/shack/house? The game where I never wanted to end up marrying George Tallman, living in a shack, driving a neon green Geo Metro with ten kids. The only difference now is, you can play online!

I've posted the before picture (sorry, I forgot to screen capture until after the counter started- I was just way too damn excited!) and the after. Let me tell you: this is fantasy life at its greatest!

Before:
After:

I will marry Edward Norton any day. And to live in a nice apartment in Chicago, with three kids (okay, so that might be a little too many, but it doesn't even matter at this point!), an eco-friendly Mazda 3 (Ed would love that. And I'm sure he wouldn't mind me calling him Ed because we are destined to be married and nicknames are acceptable), and I get to be a bartender. Fun times are ahead! ...And you're very welcome for posting the link to the greatest game of all time.

Top 10 Sexiest Actors Alive (IMO).

I was randomly reading a discussion board on imdb.com and -I'm sure- it was a bunch of pre-adolescent girls sharing their celebrity crushes. I figure the older kids (such as myself) can play this game too because, let's get real, all of those thread participants are illegal, therefore making their opinions irrelevant. I didn't want to join in on their thread because I felt like a superior among mere children, so I thought what better way to entertain my readers than to let you all in on my current top 10 hottest [celebrity] men through my blog. It changes frequently so it is currently tentative and is likely to change sometime in the near future. But that is neither here nor there. These are put into alphabetical order so I don't have to try to put them in chronological order from the smolderingly, deliciously beautiful to simply the hottest of hot.

Jason Bateman
I personally like him the most as Michael Bluth in Arrested Development, but also enjoyed his performance as Mark Loring in Juno, as well as his small roles as Rip Reed in Smokin' Aces and Pepper Brooks in Dodgeball.

Cam Gigandet
Cam is the freshest addition to the list because he is the newest on my radar. I was exposed to him because I am so unbelievably pumped up for the premiere of Twilight [Nov. 21] and he will be playing the part of James.

Jake Gyllenhaal
Donnie Darko put him on the map. No other films even matter past that point, even Brokeback Mountain. That may be a little harsh, but whatev.

Jonathan Rhys Meyers
I recently saw August Rush and instantly fell in love with this Irish lad. B-e-a-utiful.

Cillian Murphy
28 Days Later was the first film that introduced me to Cillian. It wasn't until Red Eye and Batman Begins that I became über intrigued with this other Irishman. Most recently I checked out Intermission from the library and started to like him as an actor on an entirely new level.

Edward Norton
Three films in particular led Edward to the top of my favorite actors list: American History X, Fight Club, and The Painted Veil. And those are only three of the many amazing movies that he's been in. He's legendary. And amazingly beautiful.

Robert Pattinson
Another fresh face on my list, Rob Pattinson will soon be seen as Edward Cullen in Twilight, which premieres November 21. After reading the series, I couldn't be more satisfied with the choice for Edward, because Rob is stunning, sexy, and everything Edward should be.

Ryan Reynolds
A funny man. That reason alone could put him on this list, but it just so happens that he is gorgeous as well. Just Friends doesn't get the credit it deserves; it is downright hilarious and one of my favorite rom-coms. He's also great in Smokin' Aces and Definitely, Maybe.

Channing Tatum
I'll make this simple: Sexy. Funny. Thug appeal. And he can dance.

Ed Westwick
Unbelievable charm and just look at that face. Plus, I think I start to blend Chuck Bass's persona with Ed's, which is incredibly sexy and manipulative. He's the ultimate bad boy and I'll be honest: nice guys finish last.

I think the 'research' for this entry was the most entertaining part. Ahh. Sexy men.

If it's [Mike] Brown, flush it down

"Cincinnati fell to 0-7 for the fifth time since 1991, when Mike Brown* took control of the team and the franchise fell into one of the longest stretches of futility in NFL history. Only 18 times since 1991 has a team started a season by losing its first seven games; Cincinnati accounts for five of those." –Excerpt from an article on ESPN.com

*Embarrassing excuse for an owner. We will never succeed as an organization as long as he continues to run it.

I am suffering from Post-Twilight Depression

After $74.61, four books, 2444 pages, & less than seven days, I finished the Twilight Saga. The books were gripping, intense and contained the perfect blend of romance, suspense and comedy; ingredients that are sure to satisfy any reader. I finished with an unrelenting longing for the story to continue and, quite frankly, for a piece of Edward Cullen.

I've posted some gratuitous stills from the film that -unfortunately- doesn't come out for another 34 days.

Scratch that last post. . .

Okay, so Channing's pretty much got the looks department on lockdown. But I revoke my statement in the previous post because, in all actuality, Edward Cullen (albeit a fictional character) is perfection.

I started the first book of the Twilight series last night and I've made it more than halfway through. I'm going on reserve fuel today after getting next to zero sleep staying up and reading all night. I actually considered staying in on this Friday night to finish the book because I crave it so badly. We'll see if that ends up happening. Somehow I doubt it because Edward may be a man after my own heart, but he's fictional. The Captain, however, is tangible. And I crave him too.

When Will I Find My Channing?

Just this week I've (re)watched both Step Up and Step Up 2.

(Side note: I know that they're not quality movies, but they are some serious guilty pleasures of mine and the entertainment value is almost unparalleled. The dancing, especially in the latter, is fantastic. If you haven't seen either and you're not opposed to an ordinary plot, sub-par acting, and amazing dance sequences, check it out.)

Wow. Channing Tatum is perfection. And Rob Hoffman isn't so bad himself. It's actually quite depressing because my chances of marrying a guy half as sexy (that has thug appeal but isn't a thug who can also dance) as either of them are very slim... What a downer. At least I own both of these DVDs so I can watch them over and over again.

Here is a gratuitous photo of Rob & Channing. Enjoy!

The Demise of Grammar and Spelling As We Know It

I believe that computer lingo and text messaging are slowly lowering younger generations' IQ levels as well as their ability to use proper grammar and correct spelling. Ugh. Don't get me wrong, I like to use my fair amount of omfg, rofl, lmao and brbs, but only while speaking. There's something hilarious about speaking in acronyms, but it's all in good fun and I'm funny, so it works. It doesn't work so much on the computer or through text bc when u write like this it looks like u cant talk on a nrml level with respectable ppl. Gosh, I'm fuming here and that wasn't even an entire sentence worth of garbage. But I had to prove my point. It looks stupid, thus making you look equally dumb.

I saw an über-absurd, absolutely ridiculous article before in the Facebook group "Yes: I will judge you based on your spelling, grammar, and punctuation" –written by an effing (once again, acceptable because I'm awesome) professor– regarding why the oft-misspelled words should be accepted in the forms that are incorrect. Seriously, it's depressing, and if you'd like to be infuriated as much as I was, please click here to check it out.

I'm convinced that if we got to use more than 180 characters, people would submit essays through text messaging. Barfaroni.

Also, check out this video because it's awesome and it's about spelling. Until next time...
cya & ttyl

Tree Tripping

Of all the Entourage episodes I've seen (which, in fact, would be all of them), this was definitely one of the funniest and really brought the LOLz. A few in particular would be when:

• Ari told Lloyd he would "cement his asshole shut" if he didn't watch his dog while Mrs. Ari was out of town for the night and Ari was tripping in Joshua Tree with the rest of the Entourage.
• While on his 'trip,' E wasn't speaking, so Drama takes it upon himself to get him to start talking by giving him a titty-twister.
&
• Mrs. Ari showed up home early to Lloyd, his boyfriend, Tom and many other gay, naked men swimming in their pool.

Haha, I am laughing (albeit quietly, since I'm at work and don't want to get stares) just thinking about these parts right now. I'm also thinking about watching it again as soon as I get home from work. Thank you, HBO on Demand and also to Doug Ellin for a 29-minute episode. It was heaven.

xoxo, [Amateur Blogger] Girl

As an amateur blogger, it's pretty much protocol to have some professionals whose work I idolize and admire. At this given point in time, I have a top three. Sure they might be the only three bloggers whose posts I read regularly, but whatever. They rule. Sinceriously. So here they are, in particular order:


1) Perez Hilton
The gossip gangSTAR who raised the blogosphere bar. All of his Perezcious readers love and respect him and bloggers around the world should feel the same if they don't already. I have not missed an entry of his in over 16 months, entries which now serve as daily bedtime stories. If you've never seen his work, it's mastery. I'm not even joking. He's ruthless, relentless, and works 18-hour days. And he's even branched out into creating his own fashion line, television shows and now hosts his own radio show. A homolicious renaissance diva. Loves it.


2) Chris & Jess
These two are really outstanding in their craft, blogging for the Daily Intel at NY Magazine. Every week these two provide a hilarious, insightful recap for Gossip Girl, the show they have coined "The Best. Show. Ever." Their Reality Index (Realer Than a Socialite With a Hebetudinous Nickname Like “Poppy” vs. More Transparent Than Dan’s Bravado) brings in thousands of readers weekly who can now participate in the weekly total. Even if you haven't seen the show and have zero desire to (which, if you fall into either of these categories, you officially suck at life because this is honestly one of the Best. Shows. Ever.), check out one of their recaps. You don't have to even understand what's going on because their writing is that hysterical. And intelligent, too.


3) Lil Wayne
A rapper blogging for ESPN. And he has their logo tattooed on his arm. Enough said.

I Even Wore My BG Sweatshirt for the Occasion

I'm heading to my good ol' alma mater today after work and, contrary to most, I actually enjoy the beautiful 171 mile trek up I-75 to Paradise City. I would guestimate that about two dozen of my good friends from BG will be making the trip back for Homecoming, and I'm expecting nothing less than the best time ever. No, but in all seriousness, it should be awesome.

I've been feeling super nostalgic about Bowling Green and making my return, so I'm really looking forward to seeing everyone, every thing, and eating all of the delicious foods that town has to offer (Easystreet & Corner Grill especially). It's a sad story to not be a student at BGSU anymore, and I've actually dabbled with the idea of going to grad school to simply live the dream a little bit longer, but being in as deep of debt as I am, that's just not feasible.

I already know a few things have changed (no more Brewster's, my former favorite BG bar) aside from the fact that I don't have many friends that still attend and/or live in BG (side note: you know you're old when you have to stay at the Best Western when you go back for homecoming), but I'm looking forward to seeing what my descendents are doing to upkeep the awesomeness of BG.

So here's to BG reunions, eleven bars in two blocks, and $2.75 captains and diet. I can't fucking wait.

Cheers